The greatest service we can provide to others who are in the middle of their journeys is not perfection, but honesty about our imperfections. We are called to be perfect in spirit—“Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48)—yet because we exist within earthly desire, we often fall short of that calling. When this gap is misunderstood, shame begins to take root in the soul, and what was meant to grow instead becomes restrained.

We should never seek to make mistakes, but we must accept that when we are not aligned with the path, stumbling is inevitable. “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). When we surrender to this truth—not as an excuse, but as an acknowledgment—we open ourselves to redemption and become a light for others who are still finding their footing. Without this surrender, we begin to build an idol of the best version of ourselves, and over time we will do almost anything to protect that image.

This is another trap. An image maintained at all costs pulls us away from intentionality and keeps us locked in a constant inner conflict. Like an onion, this false identity develops layers—each one added to protect the last—but because it is unnatural, the layers contradict one another. What begins as spiritual strain eventually manifests mentally, and then physically. “A double-minded man is unstable in all his ways” (James 1:8). At some point, the burden becomes too heavy to carry. It is up to us to stop feeding this cycle if we want to live with purpose.

To be perfect, in a way, requires accepting imperfection. Healing cannot begin until something is acknowledged. Human reasoning tends to respond only to what is visible and tangible, yet many of the forces shaping our lives are unseen. Scripture reminds us that “we walk by faith, not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7). Whether one believes in God or not, it is undeniable that not everything real can be explained. This leaves us with a choice: faith or ignorance. No one is predestined toward either. We all arrive at this crossroads eventually.

When a misstep occurs, it must be accepted—not hidden. Covering a mess instead of cleaning it does not remove the stain; it only ensures that you alone will remember where it lies. “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy” (Proverbs 28:13). Notice that mercy is tied not just to confession, but to forsaking—to turning away.

It is common to believe that freedom comes from confessing our mistakes to another person. Sometimes this is true—but not always. Confession is not forgiveness, and speaking something aloud does not automatically make it right. Forgiveness comes from God alone. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us” (1 John 1:9). Scripture is clear about where forgiveness originates.

Confessing to others can bring accountability or healing, but when done improperly it becomes another trap. “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16). Healing—not absolution—is the fruit here. If confession is used to ease guilt without producing change, or to receive reassurance rather than correction, it fractures the soul instead of restoring it. In those moments, confession becomes performance.

There are even times when confession to another is unwise. Not everyone is meant to carry your truth. Discernment is required. Jesus Himself did not entrust every truth to every person. “He did not commit Himself to them, because He knew all men” (John 2:24). Silence, when guided by repentance and obedience, can be more faithful than careless exposure.

We all carry burdens. “Each one should carry their own load” (Galatians 6:5), yet we are also told to “carry each other’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2). These ideas are not opposed. A support circle exists to strengthen your spirit, not to remove your responsibility. When this is understood, we step away from enablement and begin walking toward true spiritual maturity.

We often do not want others to see our mistakes. Yet one of the most powerful things we can show is that there is order even in failure, and a way out even when we fall. “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9). Do not be ashamed of missteps—move forward from them. Do not pretend they did not happen to preserve an image.

As this year comes to an end, do not dwell on what could have been. Choose today to move forward renewed. We will all make mistakes. When it happens, do not look back in condemnation—but do not ignore it either. We are forgiven for sins committed in ignorance, yet remaining ignorant once truth is revealed is not an option. “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves” (1 John 1:8). Knowledge will come. With it comes clarity.

You can choose the freedom that clarity brings, or you can attempt to hide from it. But if you choose to hide, know this—“there is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed” (Luke 12:2).
So the question remains: which will you choose today?